OK so we’re out on our morning walk and Biggles squats down for a numero deux. Ordinarily Biggles produces very healthy, consistent output, but this time all is not well, and as he adjusts position I get to see the problem. I don’t want to get all graphic about this but.. remember that Star Trek song with the line “There’s klingons on the starboard bow” ? Well my little boy has a string of klingons attached to his aft section.
As I dither about trying to get a poo bag over my hand to help extract them, he tries shaking those klingons off, but they’re not budging, so he sits down to do a bit of bottom surfing on the path. Unfortunately, the klingons are still swinging as he touches down and he ends up smearing them all over his right bum cheek, thusly:
Well that’s what was left after an emergency clean up with a poo bag and a couple of tissues, but a further cleansing was called for because my boy was a bit smelly and his rear end was attracting flies like, well, like the stuff that was smeared all over his butt cheek. So, when we got him home, we called in Shaun the Sheep:
If you think Shaun looks a bit apprehensive in that first photo, you’re probably right. When we bought him in the supermarket he probably thought he was going to make bathtime fun for little kiddies, not help scrub away Biggles’ worst ever skid mark. He came through for us though and restored my boy’s botty to its original condition, at some cost to his own personal hygiene and mental well-being.
I think it may be a while before Biggles forgives me for not being quicker with the poo bag though; every time we met somebody on the way home they took one look at Biggles’ rear end and held back from giving him the strokes and pats that he usually receives.