The medal we could have had..

Posted on August 6, 2012 by Paul

Britain’s been doing quite well in the Olympics but we’d be doing even better if the powers that be would only embrace some of the lesser known sports such as Boinging.

For the uninitiated, Boinging involves repeated pogo-stick style jumping in order to retrieve a target object from a high up place. It’s Biggles’ favorite sport, and he was training hard this morning when Susan left a plateful of cheese-covered toast crusts on the kitchen worktop.

It’s a surprisingly technical sport with marks being given for each of the four main stages of the boing.

Stage 1: Counter-surfing. Given only one brief peek, the contestant must correctly identify the high value item(s)

Stage 2: The launch. The contestant makes repeated standing jumps at the target directly from the floor and without the aid of any external apparatus

Stage 3: The snatch. On gaining sufficient height the contestant gathers all they can in a single mouth action

Stage 4: Speed eating. You only get points for what actually makes it into your stomach, so expert boingers like Biggles begin the consumption process even before their feet are back on the ground.

And there it is, the medal we could have if only the International Olympic Committee would add Boinging to their list of official sports

All seeing, all knowing, all naughty!

Posted on July 27, 2012 by Paul

The ever-watchful Beanie

I’ve had my nose to the grindstone this last few weeks and that’s meant less play time for the Beaglets, but in turn it’s created more opportunities for Beagle naughtiness. You see, when a humie is concentrating on other things he becomes an easy mark for the alert Beagle, and trust me there is no more alert Beagle than Beanie. Even when she appears to be asleep, she’s usually just lying in wait for a chance to make a lightning raid on my desk, or slurp from an unattended cup, or pick the pockets of clothing left lying even for a second.

By the way dad, I’m probably due for a worming

In keeping with his nature, Biggles relies more on tactics rather than speed and daring. He knows the opening and closing sounds made by every door in the house and recognizes when one of them has been left open. If and when he decides to take advantage of the open door, he does so in an extremely laid back, matter of fact way so as not to arouse any suspicion. Sometimes he’s so laid back he’s like on of those poor bored souls employed at the local supermarket to collect empty baskets and trolleys. “Sigh.. someone’s left the kitchen door open again. I was just getting sleepy too. Still, I guess it’s my job..” When he finds something worth grabbing of course there’s no shortage of enthusiasm, and the ensuing crashing and banging noises bring us running (and Beanie too, because Biggles’ raiding missions always leave lots of interesting stuff on the floor).

In response we get a bit better about closing doors and not leaving things lying around, but our Beagles have an answer for that too: teamwork. Biggles drains the drinking bowl, then bangs on the kitchen door to go out for a pee. Forced to leave my work, I decide to use the interruption as an excuse for a coffee break. Now unsupervised, Beanie has full access to my desk until I return. Just as I’m sitting back down in front of the computer with my fresh coffee – ready to undo Beanie’s random “typing” and monitor repositioning – Biggles announces that he’s ready to come back in, so I’m back up out of my seat and on the way to the kitchen. The coffee of course is now unattended on my desk and completely at Beanie’s mercy. If I play it differently and make Biggles wait a little while I drink my coffee, he’ll just open the door from the garden himself – damaging the paintwork in the process – and gain unsupervised access to the kitchen. Damned if I do, damned if I don’t. And when we’re finally all back in one room and I’m just getting back into work Beanie wants a drink, so I have to refill the bowl, and when I get back there’s a Bigglet sitting in my seat with a “What?” look on his face.

In an effort to break up this dual offensive I’ve been deliberately leaving the door to the bedroom open some days. This is a risky venture; if Susan’s left any socks lying around Biggles will hunt them down and there’ll be a chase and noisy Beagle discussion about who has ultimate sock rights. But.. if the bedroom is clear of socks, then it’s an irresistible lure for the Beanster. She just has to sneak in there and burrow her way into our bed.

Once there, covered by a thick sound-insulating duvet, she should be blissfully unaware of any raiding opportunities for the next few hours.

Or maybe that’s just what she wants me to think…

A Very Special Delivery!

Posted on July 10, 2012 by Paul

There’s nothing like a delivery to brighten up a wet and overcast Saturday morning!

Beanie & Biggles haven’t learned to read yet so they were oblivious to the fact that this package was addressed to them. They were likewise oblivious to other labeling on the package, such as the words “Please keep me this way up” and “Fragile”.

That’s not “logistics”, that’s Beanie & Biggles.

I guess that’s why you rarely see Beagles working as couriers. Regardless, within a few seconds the outer packaging was compromised and Biggles got his first good sniff at the contents. He immediately decided that this delivery was for him alone and started dragging it down into the corridor by our bedroom. We call this the “corridor of doom” because anything that goes down there is highly prized and unlikely to last for long. We took this as a sign that the box was full of very nice edibles. Well, either that or smelly socks. Needless to say we rescued the box from his Biggleship and began unpacking it with rather more care and self-restraint than either of our Beagles could have managed.

Inside the box was a bumper bundle of tasties from The Beagle’s Bakery – a new shop specializing in handmade gourmet biscuits, cakes and cupcakes for dogs. Before we called in Beanie & Biggles to carry out a taste test, we took a good close look at each of the items.

Boxes within boxes, and two bags of very tasty looking biccies

Inside the boxes we found a big cake personalized for our two woofers, and four mouth watering doggy cupcakes and muffins

Everything fully unpacked. Suddenly feeling hungry? We certainly were!

Everything was beautifully and professionally packaged, and each product came with a card giving its name, ingredients and shelf-life. Any time I’ve taken a look through the ingredient list of typical pet-shop treats I’ve seen lots of dodgy “filler” substances like ash, anonymous coloring agents and so on. There was nothing like that here; The Beagle’s Bakery prides itself on using only top quality, dog-safe natural ingredients and it shows. As we unpacked each of the items both of us became distinctly peckish. They all just looked and smelled so good.. I’ve never felt that way about dog treats before!

Of course it’s all very well having treats that whet the human appetite, but what really counts is how tasty they are to doggies. People who’ve seen Beanie & Biggles in action might accuse them of not having very discerning palates. Their definition of “edible” is much broader than ours, and includes things that are repulsive to most humans such as two day old dog poo (although even they draw the line at PotNoodle). However having survived life with them now for several years we’re able to recognize the behavioral cues that indicate a food’s ranking. So let’s see how the Beagle’s Bakery samples shaped up.

Heart-shaped Cheese Biscuits

Beanie’s “leave” command is normally pretty solid, but it came close to breaking for these biscuits, and she actually drooled (very rare for The Beanster). Definitely tastier than your average biccie!

Flapjack

Biggles’ entire lower half was wagging so much for these flapjacks that he could hardly keep his bum on the seat. Definitely a hit with the Bigglet!

Chocolate Pupcake

Note the intent look on Beanie’s face. Really tasty food is a serious matter, and this pupcake was seriously tasty

Wuffin
When you stick a muffin in your woofer, it’s called a Wuffin!

My lighting stands were endangered by this wuffin as the wagging reached epic proportions

The gob-stopper! Biggles tried to swallow it whole for a few seconds before he reluctantly admitted defeat and resorted to chewing.

Doggy Chocolate Celebration Cake

I’ve saved the biggest and best item – the Celebration Cake – for last, though in reality it was the first to get (partially) eaten.

Once we’d got everything laid out on the table, and before the official taste tests began, I wanted to get a shot of our Beagles getting their first look at all the goodies. Susan brought in Biggles first and instantly there was chaos. Even with Susan’s hand firmly gripping his collar, our powerful little boy managed to boing up to the table and grab a nibble of cake!

Biggles struggles to decide which treat to target. Will it be the flapjacks?

Nope, it’s the cake! This was taken a millisecond after his mouth scored a hit on one of the bones surrounding the celebration cake. The last time I saw wild eyes like that was in a Bruce Lee film!

And here’s the damage. It was lucky we got a shot of the cake before The Bigglet took a nibble out of it!

We decided against trying to get photos of Beanie & Biggles with the cake after that; it’s clearly the nuke in the Beagle’s Bakery arsenal! When all the shooting was finished and our two pups had calmed down, Susan served a slice of cake up for them in their bowls. There was almost complete silence as they ate it. In our house, that’s the mark of something really, really tasty, and its typically reserved only for Susan’s home-made chicken soup (we get hours of plaintive wailing at the kitchen door during preparation, then merciful silence during the actual feeding).

And finally..

All the treats were a hit with Beanie & Biggles, but the cake was the clear favorite. Susan’s done home baking for our pups before but we’ve never had this kind of reaction, so The Beagle’s Bakery has definitely hit the mark in the taste department. As a bonus their stuff is visually & nasally appealing to us humans too; I know that shouldn’t matter of course, but it does. Looking through the website the prices seem very reasonable; the doggy gift packs you see in supermarkets and pet shops aren’t much cheaper but they’re typically full of junk while these treats are made only with top notch natural ingredients.

What’s more there seems to be the option to personalize nearly everything, not just the cake; you can even order up a jar full of bone-shaped biscuits with your dog’s name stamped into them. I’m certain I’ll be ordering something when The B’s birthdays come along.. but what? I’m attracted by the cake and love the idea of personalized biscuits, but still I just can’t get over the sight of Biggles with a whole Wuffin jammed in his cakehole!

Visit the Beagle’s Bakery here: http://www.thebeaglesbakery.co.uk