It started just like a normal Monday. Beanie & Biggles had a little snuggle in bed then went out into the garden to perform their morning duties. The cows were out but our two generously decided to spare them the pain of a severe woofing, and instead just sat on their bums and watched quietly.

Back inside – just as Dad was preparing to take them on their morning walk – Biggles sounded the alarm. Something big had pulled into the drive, and now intruders were entering the garden through the top gate. He woofed loudly to alert the household, but nobody seemed to take any notice.  Nobody except Beanie that is; she joined in the woof-fest, but still Mum and Dad just carried on as normal. The Bigglet had almost worn out his woofer by the time he and his sister were loaded into the car for a long walk on the beach.

On their return, the intruders were still on site and there was lots of noise coming from just outside the house. Try as they might Beanie & Biggles couldn’t get a proper vantage point to see was going on, and no-one would let them into the garden. It was all very frustrating!

Our little boy so wanted to defend his home, but his paws were tied; the humies kept him confined to the house. Eventually he just gave up and left it all to fate. What’s the point in trying to save the world if the world doesn’t want to be saved?

Beanie eased her stress with a vigorous humping of her Mum’s leg. If the apocalypse was coming, why not “check out” with an extended rumpy-pumpy session?

The hours dragged by and eventually the intruders packed up and went home. Finally Beanie and Biggles were allowed out to inspect the devastation! All the trees had gone, there was a deep trench running down one side of the garden, and a huge yellow thing was sitting close to the house.

Still, it wasn’t all bad. The kibble fairy had paid a visit to their kennel (which strangely had moved on to the deck) and the remnants of the trees made for some quality chewing:

There was nothing the dynamic duo could do to restore their garden to its former state, but Biggles was determined to exact his revenge. He went right up to the big yellow thing, cocked his leg high and gave it the pee of the century. The following morning when the intruders returned, their yellow monster wouldn’t start. They kept mumbling something about the cold having broken it, unaware of the true cause: death by Biggle piddle.

It’s taken a while, but life in our new home has settled into a comfortable routine. Beanie & Biggles have established new routines too, and a number of them involve poo.

Back in Glasgow, failing to scoop a freshly fallen poop was likely to incur a hefty fine, and because of that our two Beagles’ obsession with consuming and rolling in the brown stuff was relatively easy to manage. Out here in the country things are different; there’s no pressure to pick up poo unless it falls directly on a path or pavement. As a result, nearly every walk ends up being an all-you-can-eat Soylent Brown buffet. Some of the local dogs have a diet which produces poo with a reddish tint, and this seems to be particularly flavorsome to the Beagle palette. Even if you manage to dodge all the doggy doo, there’s still a plentiful supply of horse & cow droppings – it just never ends. It’s a wonder our two still  have room for their breakfasts after their morning walk. But of course they do. Still it’s meant to be good for them – friendly gut bacteria and all that, sort of a doggy version of Danone Activia. I can see the adverts now: “Feeling bloated? Sluggish? Just sling a big pile of horse muck down yer throat, that’ll sort you out”

Anyway, the morning routine goes something like this. A little while before we get up, I open up Beanie & Biggles crates so that they can come for a snuggle in our bed. Beanie jumps onto the bed almost straight away and quickly wriggles under the covers. Biggles – who still has a “thing” about not being able to jump onto things – needs more encouragement, but he makes it up there eventually. A little while later he goes out for his first pee of the day. He usually gets into a long-distance name calling session with local farm dog, and of course he’s always ready to defend the garden against horses and cows.

A boy must always be alert and ready to respond to any threats to his territory. Unless those threats are a bit scary, in which case it’s probably better to pretend you haven’t seen them and take the covering off your ball.

More serious threats can simply be monitored from behind the safety screen on the deck. It’s not too far from the kitchen if you feel the need to run inside.

Eventually Beanie joins him for sniff about, and before long it’s time for their first walk of the day. On their return – if they’re lucky – the treat fairy has visited their kennel and left pieces of kibble on and around it.

The kibble could be anywhere..

So a thorough search is required!

Breakfast is next, followed by a good long nap that lets us human types actually get a bit of work done. When they awake, there’s often time for a bit of play.

A ball is good!

But a ball on a rope..

..well that’s just..

..the business!

A carrot may seem like a good thing too

It’s certainly crunchy

But the taste is a big let-down. Nowhere near as good as poo

Lately we’ve been helping Beanie & Biggles to make new friends. They’ve already met a fellow Beagle called Bundy, and now there’s Ruairidh (let’s just call him Ru!)

He’s never tried agility before, but he quickly got the hang of it when he had a little go in our garden.

His impressive debut put a bit of pressure on our two to perform. Beanie responded with her super hero impersonation:

Biggles had a bit of a false start, but then he hit his stride.

Aaargh! Should have gone over the jump, not round it!

Looking better!

That’s it – just keep your eye on it Biggles!

Just in case anyone else is busy planning their summer schedule (around their mutts)…..

Sue Rose has just announced some more dates for lure coursing meetings in the summer. Full details here:

http://lure-coursing.blogspot.com/

If you haven’t tried it I highly recommend it – especially if you have either hounds or terriers!