Some very strange things have been happening of late..
One morning we heard some weird noises coming from the back garden. Upon investigation we found that the bin had been opened and various items of garbage – crisp packets, cheese and cake wrappers mostly – had been pulled out of it. Purely coincidentally Biggles was in the vicinity, desperately trying to decide which item he was going run off into the garden with before we could clean everything up. As it happened he plumped for an empty packet of Walkers salt & vinegar flavor, which in my opinion was not the best choice. But I digress. The point is that the outside bin is tall and hadn’t been knocked over by say, a gale force wind, so what mysterious force had managed to open it and extract all those items?
Later in the week we had further strange occurrences, this time involving socks. We kept finding them strewn about the corridor and the floor of our bedroom. We’d pick them up and tidy them away in their drawer, then a short time afterward they’d be back out, as though they’d gone on a walk by themselves.
Having seen far too many horror films I immediately suspected the work of a demon or poltergeist, but I needed proof. I set up a little video camera pointing at the sock draw and went back to work. When I later returned, sure enough the socks had gone walkies again and the camera had recorded the following disturbing footage. Hint – turn the volume up when you play it!
Since Biggles is normally such a good boy, I can only think that’s he’s been possessed by a demon with a penchant for salt & vinegar crisp packets and a sock fetish. After the video was taken that same demon drove my poor innocent boy to empty the sock drawer once again, and roll on his back with a fresh pack of Tesco value socks in his gob, periodically emitting grunts of pleasure.
Since most exorcism rituals are aimed at humans rather than beagles, I guess I’ll just head over to Homebase and drive this particular demon out with some strong magnetic drawer catches.
To sleep, perchance to dream … of socks. And notice how there aren’t any on Susan’s feet!